Your Kid is Like a Goat: What to Watch Out For with Poisons

It's a common scenario for new parents: you are driving in your car and you look in the backseat and your kid is munching on a book. Or you go into the other room for no more than 5 minutes and when you return, your kid has devoured the Pottery Barn catalog.

Today, I am here to tell you not to worry about it. It ain't the best thing for their virgin stomach lining but it ain't gonna kill them either. Kids at these ages are like goats: they will put whatever they can in their mouths. And who can blame them? They are either sucking on the boob eating the same thing day in and day out (the boob part ain't bad, it's the lack of variety) or when they graduate to solids, they are eating nothing but sludgy green stuff.

They want something with substance! They want something a little naughty and most of the time it involves reading materials. But that's not all! My daughter one time pulled herself up to a wooden end table and gnawed the stain off down to the bare wood.

So what is safe and what isn't? Here is a quick list of things where "everything in moderation" does not apply courtesy of the American Association of Poison Control Centers.

{mosnooad}Medicines: these are OK in the right amount for the right person. They can be dangerous for children who take the wrong medicine or swallow too much.

Iron pills: adult-strength iron pills are very dangerous for children to swallow. Children can start throwing up blood or having bloody diarrhea in less than an hour.

Cleaning products that cause chemical burns: these can be just as bad as burns from fire. Products that cause chemical burns include include drain openers, toilet bowl cleaners, rust removers, and oven cleaners.

Nail glue remover and nail primer: some products used for artificial nails can be poisonous in surprising ways. Some nail glue removers have caused cyanide poisoning when swallowed by children. Some nail primers have caused burns to the skin and mouth of children who tried to drink them.

Hydrocarbons: this is a broad category that includes gasoline, kerosene, lamp oil, motor oil, lighter fluid, furniture polish, and paint thinner. These liquids are easy to choke on if someone tries to swallow them. If that happens, they can go down the wrong way, into the lungs instead of the stomach. If they get into someone’s lungs, they make it hard to breathe. They can also cause lung inflammation (like pneumonia). Hydrocarbons are among the leading causes of poisoning death in children.

Pesticides: chemicals to kill bugs and other pests must be used carefully to keep from harming humans. Many pesticides can be absorbed through skin. Many can also enter the body by breathing in the fumes. Some can affect the nervous system and can make it hard to breathe.

Windshield washer solution and antifreeze: Small amounts of these liquids are poisonous to humans and pets. Windshield washer solution can cause blindness and death if swallowed. Antifreeze can cause kidney failure and death if swallowed.

Wild mushrooms: many types of mushrooms grow in many areas of the country. Some are deadly to eat. Only experts in mushroom identification can tell the difference between poisonous mushrooms and safe mushrooms.

Alcohol: when children swallow alcohol, they can have seizures, go into a coma, or even die. This is true no matter where the alcohol comes from. Mouthwash, facial cleaners, and hair tonics can have as much alcohol in them as alcoholic beverages.

Good luck noodads.