This guy is an idiot

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This guy is an idiot. If you think this is funny, you are an idiot too.

Why My Onesie Maneuver is Cry Proof

Ah onesies…the undergarment of choice for the under 3 crowd.  With it's soft cotton and 3 button snaps. It is brilliantly designed. When used for the power of good, it can offer an extra layer of warmth, and a support hammock for a diaper full of pee. But for those who aren't trained in the ways of proper onesie application, it can be a one way ticket to Pissed-Off-ville or even worse, a near death suffocation.

There is a proper way to put on a onesie. And this way is cry-proof. Here's what you need to do:
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“The Alien Inside My Wife” and Other Ultrasound Discoveries

If your wife is pregnant and it still hasn't hit you, the ultrasound marks the instance in which the world falls out from under your feet. What once was just the idea of a living breathing kid in an instant becomes a living breathing thing that you see with your own eyes.

In a typical pregnancy, the first ultrasound is scheduled around the 18th week of pregnancy. At this point of the pregnancy, even though the little tax deduction is only about 8 inches long, it has enough features to look like something you can relate to.
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Noodad Himself in Both Noodad and Halloween Spirit

Noodad himself, all decked out for Halloween… and the site!

The Great Noodad Halloween Checklist

It’s that time of year again. The time to carve some pumpkins, rot your teeth, and scare the bejeesus out of the neighborhood kids. But, the most important part of Halloween season is how you enjoy it with your kids.

If you are like me, all your childhood memories of Halloween are all garbled together into a huge gobstopper of memories. Wouldn’t you want the best for your kids? That’s why I have created the Great Noodad Halloween Checklist for dads new or old. This checklist will ensure you covered all your bases and you make 2008 the best Halloween ever.

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The Answers to “What the Hell Are Tubes?”

My son had tubes put in last week. He had multiple infections in his 19 month old ears and the doctor had suspected that the excess fluid in his ears were causing hearing complications.

You probably have heard the term, "tubes" thrown around parent circles. In fact, recent stats say that almost 2 million American kids get tubes every year. But if you are like me, you probably have no real clue what it is really about. In this article, I will do my best to talk you through the technical stuff, the surgery stuff, and the post-op stuff.
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When Your Kids Are Bi-Racial

Racial equality is a hot topic in my household. Maybe it’s because my neighbor’s dog is racist. He never barks at anyone else except me. I, of course, am the only person that is not white in my entire neighborhood. If I were to decipher his angry bark I would no doubt hear, “Go back to where you come from, you foreigner.”

Seriously though, I am Chinese and my wife is not. My kids are half-chinese, half white. This creates a whole new set of topics to talk about and examples to set. Frequently, my 4 year old daughter will comment on how “Daddy is the only one in the family that has black hair.” When asked what color mommy’s hair is and what color the kid’s hair is, it seems like a lesson in color theory:
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Billy Who? What You Need to Know About Jaundice

You may have seen the babies when you toured the hospital. There they are. With Kool Moe Dee sunglasses on, encased in a clear case like the ear worm in Wrath of Khan. No, they aren't getting fake baked for Spring Break, they are being treated for Jaundice.

Jaundice (pronounced like your buddy Jon, got dissed) is the name given to when your kid's skin and the white's of their eyes are very yellow. It frequently occurs with newborns within the first week but most of the time, it corrects itself.
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Preparing Your Toddler (and Yourself) for Halloween

Newborns don’t really care about Halloween. They are mostly dressed up so you can get some pictures and show off how cute they are to your neighbors. But once your kid reaches 3 and 4 years old, Halloween will be as exciting to them as the Super Bowl is to you. Here are some tips to help you prepare your toddler (and yourself) for the spookiest day of the year.
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Sick Kid Etiquette: When to Cancel, Keep, and Reschedule Plans

Kids get sick. That’s a fact of parenthood and you just need to deal with it. What you do about it is clear: you give them medicine, you wipe their noses, and if it gets worse, you take them to the doctor.

What isn’t clear is how your kid’s sickness affects launch status for playdates, school, and house guests. Fortunately, i can shed some light on the situation with my handbook of Sick Kid Etiquette. With this guide, you will be able to quickly determine how to proceed in any social situation with a sick kid snotting on your shoulder.
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