Poodad is just one of those things that you know, “Happens”. And no doubt, it will happen when your kid is in the tub. This can be caused by many factors: the warmth of the water, the stimulation in the “Poodad Area” with the washcloth, the proximity to dinnertime, or some twisted vendetta against you. Regardless of reason, you need to know what to do when this occurs.
We all joke about how much “damage” a kid can do in the diaper when it comes to dropping the deuce but there are some serious health concerns when it comes to it. Contact to the skin can cause diaper rash or worse. Ingestion can cause serious health problems. So you need to know how to contain this incident quickly and without further harm. Read the rest of this entry »
With 3 kids under the age of 6 I am ready to call it quits and cap my family size at 5. Based on past performance, my wife and I are a pretty fertile bunch. And although I feel incredibly fortunate to have such virility, it can be really scary. I don’t need a 4th set of butt cheeks to wipe. Or a 4th mouth to feed. I don’t need another tour of duty with no sleep and no alone time. I’m done with kids and I don’t want any surprises. But maybe I am a little afraid of the ol’ snip snip. Or maybe I just want to do this thing slow. I don’t necessarily want to nuke all my soldiers at once. Or blow up the bridge over the River Kwai.
So what’s a dude to do? I started researching some ways to lower my sperm count. Although not fool-proof I figure if I do a little everyday, it will only help my cause. For you guys who don’t have your kids yet and want to help your chances, you may want to read this list so you know what not to do.
Some dads like gadgets and others like the Father’s Day tie. I am more the former, but this year I got something that beat any possible gift I could have dreamed up. My kids made me a poster called “Things I Love About Dad”.
My son busted into my bedroom this morning, like the Incredible Hulk through a wall. “HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!” he said, clutching the poster. I was still pretty sleepy as I was in the middle of exercising Father’s Day executive privilege also known as sleeping in.
Here’s how it’s done. Moms, get your kid or kids together. Next, ask them what they like about dad. If there is a baby, ask the bigger kids what the baby would say. Next, you write these on the poster, then you let the kids decorate. That’s it. My kids all like when I play with them, especially when we play ball. I learned that my son really thinks it’s awesome when we play slot cars together. My daughter likes it when I help her with things when she is afraid. She also thinks I look very handsome in my work clothes.
How can you beat that noodads? What did you get for Father’s Day?
Let’s face it, your kids have way too many things to play with. If you are like my family, besides the standard toys that play with from birthday gifts, etc, they have a whole sea of useless crappy toys.
If toys are like drugs, your kids grandparents are most likely the biggest dealers. But at least grandma and grandpa give the good quality stuff. Dealing with toy overflow from grandparents is an entirely different topic and one that warrants its own article.
Today, we are going to concentrate n the other stuff. To continue the metaphor, the toys you need to watch out for are from outside suppliers. They have lots of appeal but their poor quality only gives your kid a quick fix. I’m talking about the big 3: fast food places, birthday parties, and carnivals. Read the rest of this entry »
I discovered the beginnings of a great website for kids. The guy calls himself Sky Guy and he talks to kids about astronomy. I met Tom the “Sky Guy” through Seesmic and he is a very knowledgeable and friendly guy. He currently only has 2 videos so far, but by the looks of the following video, he has a good start to a great show for your kids.
Being a dad means an increasingly complex web of finances - multiple bank accounts, life insurance, IRAs, 529 accounts, credit cards in the hands of kids, and with all of that comes all of the financial paperwork and transactions to support it. Cause and effect being at play here, that means you’re also increasingly vulnerable to account abuse and identity theft. Being Noodads, you of course are smart enough to know you don’t write down internet passwords and you shred your sensitive mail…but does that go far enough? Security experts would say no.
I know that so I was doing some research online about credit checks and credit monitoring services…specifically interested in Life Lock. Life Lock is the company founded by that guy who plasters his Social Security Number on TV and buses. Turns out that his life wasn’t “locked” - some dude in TX was able to open a bank account using his SSN. Little piece of advice…don’t dare cheats - they have the time and the wherewithal to %^$# you. Life Lock is also being sued by several states. You can read all about it in this New York Times article.
It’s that time of year again. This past Memorial Day weekend officially kicks off the summer barbecue season. But a passion for eating grilled meats is not enough to get you through the season with your family. There are a few things you should know when preparing for a summer barbecue.
Background Prep
Frequently, the host is a friend of only you or your wife, not the both of you. So it is important that you get prepped on the background of the home owner. You don’t want to walk into the situation unprepared. Likewise, if you are the one that knows the host, prep your wife. Items to discuss beforehand: how many kids, what do they do for work, who are they friends with, etc. It never hurts to prepare. For instance, you don’t want to start railing on the local gas station only to find out that the host is the owner of it. Read the rest of this entry »
I hated math growing up. It was, hands down my least favorite subject. Why, because despite attending well regarded schools, no-one ever made math fun by making it relevant to what interested me - like sports.
It was always memorization of tables…and complex operations such as algebra, stats and trig were self-serving exercises. The closest I ever came to actually enjoying math was in geometry but that was probably more a function of the fact that you could draw and play games on a TI-81 graphing calculator. That and this girl I had a huge crush on sat next to me.
I wish that someone had made math interesting because I sure as as shit needed math once I got out into the workforce and I wish I’d retained more growing up.
It seems to me (and I wish it had dawned on my folks 20 years ago) that an easy way to make math interesting is by connecting it to sports.
The ReviewDad clan was on the move today… We headed down to the in-law’s place in Southwest Florida. We’re here and we’re happy. It’s 9pm. We have all of our luggage. My son is in bed and I’ve got a glass of wine in hand. I’m in a good place and I’m ripe for reflection on the day and this stage of my life.
Reflection #1 - JetBlue rocks, everyone else pales in comparison. Three reasons:
Extra Leg Room - if you’ve ever tried to strap a Britax Marathon into an airplane seat, you know how valuable additional inches of space are. JetBlue has the most.
TV - Free Nick at 30,000 feet = Nirvana for parents + kids. Figuring out how to change the channels on the armrest is 15 min of entertainment during pre-flight that’s a god-send.
Service - the flight attendants DON’T SUCK. They’re not wretched, miserable trolls taking out their Read the rest of this entry »
If you are a dad that goes to work, you know that kids (god love’m) can put a serious damper on your morning routine. You could have felt you had the most efficient, streamlined morning routine only to discover that it is your kid or kids that bring it to a screeching halt.
The bottom line is kids change our lives. Some of it is good. Some of it is bad. All of it is change. That is why if you have a morning routine that ends up in you needing to be productive and presentable for work you need to know these 5 rules.
Rule #1: Never put on your dress shirt until right before you leave
It has happened to me 3 times in the last 6 weeks. A kid rubs his dirty breakfast mouth on your neatly pressed white dress shirt shoulder just as you are running out the door. Or even worse, your kid throws up on you. I always iron my shirt and leave it on a hanger in my laundry room. I walk around in an undershirt until the last possible moment before leaving. Read the rest of this entry »
Poodad is just one of those things that you know, “Happens”. And no doubt, it will happen when your kid is in the tub. This can be caused by many factors: the warmth of the water, the stimulation in the “Poodad Area” with the washcloth, the proximity to dinnertime, or some twisted vendetta against you. Regardless of reason, you need to know what to do when this occurs.
