To Wii or Not to Wii: Babyproof your Marriage with a Video Game System?

I’ve been told I’m the luckiest guy alive. I’ve been told I’ve experienced the greatest moment ever. And neither of these platitudes have anything to do with the birth of my son, meeting a celebrity or finding a $100 bill on the street.

A couple of weekends ago, as Mrs. ReviewDad and I were running errands with ReviewDad Jr. asleep in the backseat, trunk full of über-sized loot from Costco, she said coolly and without looking at me (as if reflecting on an idea long considered) “should we get a Wii?”Take a moment to read that line again and let it sink in. Go ahead. I’ll wait.

Yes. Those are the precise words that came out of my wife’s mouth. I shit you not.

After fumbling a “huh?” as my first response, I had the presence of mind to utter a semi-quizzical “yes” fearing a moment that would soon be passed and an opportunity soon lost.

It was as surreal as it sounds.

The thought of acquiring a Nintendo Wii never crossed my mind…and I had no idea that she even knew what one was. Accept for the sticky, flickering Ms. Pac Man we played at a bar on a date early on, I’d never seen her show the slightest interest in video games.

I was shocked. She might as well have said “let’s have a threesome with my friend Charlize Theron.”

Now, I own a PlayStation II courtesy of my brother who upgraded to X-Box 360 but the truth is that I thought my video game-playing days were pretty much behind me forever. Some guys hold onto that piece of their Predad identity (and more power to ’em) but I have never considered myself to be a “gamer” (I had to ask foodad what “pwn” meant [foodad's note: It's pronounced "own". Only noobs say "pown."]) and was resolute to accept that it was one of those things that, in parenthood, got de-prioritized to the point that it was relegated to “that was then” in the “this is now” evaluation.

I like video games…grew up with NES and Genesis…bled $1 bills into Golden Tee at the pub in my 20s…but with the birth of my son, for me, went time for such things.

Games take effort and since becoming a dad, I’ve found that if I’m doing anything in front of the TV in the precious few moments that I get there each night, it’s just vegging out in the purest of ways…with my only aerobic actions being breathing, blinking and “flickering.” Gaming is entertainment and when you’re a parent, as you Noodads know, you gotta pick and choose wisely. For me, the Sox take precedence over MLB ’07.

Beyond the question of priorities, playing Tiger Woods PGA Tour ’06 constitutes a solitary, “me” activity. The wife had no interest in learning the game (I offered) and when I tried to lure her in with the ability to create a character in her own image, she called me a dork. We have one TV and she’ll watch baseball with me. Two birds with one stone…you know how it goes…

But where Wii introduced a 4th dimension to the gaming experience – that of real, aerobic physical interaction and the extension of that idea to multi-person play, therein did it establish a beachhead in a lot of places no video game system has gone before…like nursing homes and living rooms of couples with babies. You’ve gotta give Nintendo props. SMART.

“Have sex to save the friendship.” Most of us will recognize this classic line from Seinfeld. Well this Wii incident sets up a similar prospect for tired couples often homebound due to nap schedules and 7:30 bedtimes… “Buy a video game system to save the marriage.”

Ok. Maybe it’s not that extreme a situation…I’m hoping that you all are doing better than that. We feel pretty darn secure in our marriage given everything it’s undergone in the past year. But maybe it’s more about saving some of our sanity by introducing a new element into our decidedly less go-go lifestyle. Wii might be a chance to be more dynamic and active while within our own walls…and out of the sack (you thought I was going to forget that, didn’t you?!).

Mrs. ReviewDad’s rationale for why we should consider getting a Wii is pretty sound. It goes something like this… If we’re going to spend our evenings at home in front of the TV, we might as well be on our feet getting some exercise. We don’t have time for the gym and summer reruns suck, so for her, it’s a time utilization thing…making the best of an otherwise inactive situation.

Go on and admit it fellas – we all think that we’re Jedi Knights when it comes to tech toy justification but she just went all Yoda on this one!

So that’s where we’re at – we’re in agreement that we want, n’er need a Wii. Our health and sanity as a couple and as a team demand it!

Now if we can only find one!

POSTSCRIPT – In an event that must have involved the alignment of the moon and stars, I found a Wii last Sunday morning at my local Circuit City. So far, so good. We’re having fun. We’re working on our “Miis.” Look for a Noodad.com review of the Nintendo Wii in the near future.