When Your Wife Dresses Your Boy Like a Girl
Posted on 04 08, 2007 under Her by Noodad | Comments
Kids clothes are tricky for dads. Some dads operate under the premise that whatever their wives buy for their kids, that's what they wear. In some extreme cases, there are dads who obsess over their kids (from infancy to school age) always sporting the local team jersey.
I consider myself in a lucky situation(somewhere inthe middle): my wife does the majority of the clothes shopping but she holds my opinions in high regard: many times IM'ing me links from Gymboree.com or BabyStyle or Janie and Jack and asking me to pick out what I like. When we are at the mall, she will hold up two different shirts and ask me to pick which one I like. For those who don't know me personally, the one with any orange in it is always the winner.
I love that she includes me in the decisions and values my tastes. Most of the times, I am able to truly help pick out my kids' wardrobes. And work in the occasional Red Sox jersey in there. But every once in a while, there is a surprise. Once in a blue moon, a rogue article of clothing makes it into the wardrobe, off the hanger and onto my poor kid's body.
Last night my family went out to a local restaurant. It was the first time we went out as a family of 5. My daughter had a cute flowered pattern shirt and a pair of jeans from with a matching flower embroidery from Janie & Jack. My son had a nice brown pullover with a ferocious looking bear on it and jeans from Gymboree. And my infant son had a girlie white doily like hooded sweater with Cape Cod style blue striped pants. Do you see the issue?
I didn't at first. In fact, I didn't until the waitress noticed my baby boy sitting next to me and in a reaction that could only be described as her biological clock going on overdrive and her uterine beacon flashing code red said, "How old is your daughter?" (she couldn't resist asking the question instead of refilling my IBC.)
Of course, my real daughter unknowingly bailed her out from an awkward moment and yelled out, "I'm four and a half." To which the cool-as-a-cucumber waitress replied, "Wow, you are a big girl now!"
{mosnooad}So there you have it. It's out there. My son was wearing girly clothes. And the waitress thought he was a girl. I don't care if the sweater was hanging in the boy section or not, that article of clothing belongs on the body of a Joan not a John.
It's not surprising. When kids are first born, you really can't tell the difference sometimes. They all look like E.T. But that is the exact reason why you need to take careful care in choosing very boy-like clothing for your boys and very girl-like clothing for your girls. There is a reason why most people stick with blue for boys and pink for girls. Despite their best intentions to avoid gender classification, it can be frustrating when strangers don't know what you have. PLEASE NOTE: If your kid is a hermaphrodite, try yellow or green.
Be warned: your wife will disagree with you. You will hear responses like, "That outfit is cute!" or "You are overreacting." Keep in mind that women have eye filters that differ greatly from men. These are the same women that call their ugly friends "pretty" and their hot friends, "Sluts". If your kid is packing heat, you want other people to know it. It's ok to feel that way.
So what do you do? Well, if you are in the first category of dad-involvement as it pertains to clothing decisions (i.e. no involvement at all), you are out of luck. Until you assume some of the decision making, you have no right to complain.
Same goes for anyone in the category of belief that every kid should wear a replica jersey every day. Your wives may be trying desperately to offer variety to the wardrobe and you painted her in a corner. She had no choice but to use her "best guess" and choose for the both of you.
Sadly, if you are in my situation, you really have no play either. I made it really clear to my wife that the outfit looked a little girlie. She probably will never put him in it again. Mistakes were made. the damage was done. We move on. Hey, you can't be truly stylish without misfiring a few times. Just make sure to pack that extra Red Sox sweatshirt in the car next time.

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