Dispatch from the Family Vacation Frontline

The ReviewDad clan was on the move today… We headed down to the in-law’s place in Southwest Florida. We’re here and we’re happy. It’s 9pm. We have all of our luggage. My son is in bed and I’ve got a glass of wine in hand. I’m in a good place and I’m ripe for reflection on the day and this stage of my life.

Reflection #1 - JetBlue rocks, everyone else pales in comparison. Three reasons:

1. Extra Leg Room - if you’ve ever tried to strap a Britax Marathon into an airplane seat, you know how valuable additional inches of space are. JetBlue has the most.
2. TV - Free Nick at 30,000 feet = Nirvana for parents + kids. Figuring out how to change the channels on the armrest is 15 min of entertainment during pre-flight that’s a god-send.
3. Service - the flight attendants DON’T SUCK. They’re not wretched, miserable trolls taking out their life failures on you. They’re genuinely nice people who understand they’re in a service industry. I’ve flown JetBlue for years and have never not come away with a positive (or at least neutral) experience with regard to the flight crew. When was the last time you could say that about any other airline (although I’ll admit that Southwest comes close). Get this…as I struggled to get down the aisle during pre-boarding, part Dad part pack-mule with a diaper bag, backpack, camera bag and car seat, one of the flight attendants offered to help me with my burden!

Reflection #2 - We vacation in Florida now. And I’m OK with that.

In my younger days, I viewed the land of Mickey and dinner at 4 pm as the 10th circle of Purgatory…god’s waiting room…one 65,000 square mile South of the Border tourist trap. Vacation was a time for adventure. You bought a plane ticket, got a Lonely Planet guidebook, tossed it in your backpack and walked out the door. You came back two weeks later exhausted but enriched. Now, and I feel very fortunate to have this situation, the proposition of a free place to stay, free golf, a nice beach and some alone time with Mrs. ReviewDad courtesy of babysitters Nana and Papa is hands down more alluring than distant lands, exotic cultural experiences and new stamps in my passport. We’ll travel the world again but for now, this vacation (we do this 2x per year) fits us perfectly.

Reflection #3 - Traveling with kids is bad but not for the reasons one would think.

Their may be no tougher test of a man’s fortitude, resourcefulness and mettle in the 21st century than man vs. the travel apparatus. From buying a ticket through wrangling your luggage off of a conveyor belt or into a rental car, it’s a constant battle for survival and sanity. All of the forces are marshaled against you. You wait, you schlep, you strip down to your shirt, belt-less pants and socks. If you’re a dad, you do the OJ thing (the running and jumping thing, not the other!) to catch that earlier flight to be home in time for dinner.

If you travel regularly for work like I do, you develop a routine, a playbook and a bag of tricks that minimize hassle, speed your departure and arrival and help save your sanity. You pack light, you move fast and you’re all business. Not with kids. When you travel as a dad, you’re that guy…you know him - he’s the guy you look at when you travel as “business guy” and think to yourself “thank god that’s not me today!”

Traveling with kids is bad in that you have to accept the fact that you can’t pack light, you can’t move fast and you’re going to spend a lot of time in restrooms struggling with Diaper Decks dealing with your kids’ business rather than being all business.

Yeah, the logistics of kids on planes, trains and automobiles is tough but when you’re in the thick of it, you’re task focused and you quickly get to a point where you could care less about what others think. Your 18 month old is going to kick the seat in front of you…no matter how you explain why not to. That person will deal. We’ve all been there. He’ll man up. It’s in the moments during which everyone is strapped in, happy with juice boxes and coloring books that you’ll think about the inefficiency of the whole ordeal and it’ll kill you.

This period of reflection is now over. To quote Sandra Boynton and the book I read earlier this evening “the day is done [at 10 pm - it’s Florida!], they [the in-laws] say good night and somebody [Mrs. ReviewDad] turns off the light. My father in-law and I have an early tee time tomorrow!