The Argument That Can’t Be Won

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The Argument That Can’t Be Won

Posted on 06 06, 2006 under The Manual by Noodad | Comments

After your kid starts to talk, the next major milestone is when they actually think about what they are saying. But just because they know how to say the words, they don"t necessarily know what they mean.

One of the most interesting and frustrating things that happens, is when your kid argues with you about something they have no business arguing with you about.

Last night, for instance, my daughter argued with me about the use of the term, "O.J." We were not referring tot he verb usage meaning: "To kill your wife and her lover, and get away with murder because you played the race card" We are talking about the yellow, pulpy substance that you typically drink in the morning.

My daughter: "Daddy, it"s not O.J.! It is called orange juice."

Me: "It is also sometimes called, O.J."

My ignorant offspring: "No it isn"t."

Me: "Yes it is."

My belligerent brat: "No it isn"t! You don"t know what you are talking about"

I admit, a third of me is proud of how she speaks her mind. Another third is upset at how she bullied me and talked disrespectfully at me. The final third is pissed that my immaturity caused this disrespect.

You see, these are the types arguments that can"t be won. I don"t like to lose and I hate to be wrong. It is unfortunate that I sometimes cannot control my urge to prove my kid wrong—even when i know that I am right.

But I"m the parent here. I need to step back and say to myself, "It doesn"t matter." I need to calmly tell her that sometimes, people call orange juice, "O.J." If she still persists, I should drop it. What"s the worst that can happen? She calls it orange juice the rest of her life?

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mattdm 3 years ago 1 point
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Maybe rather than arguing, try asking questions -- \"You sound pretty sure of yourself. How do you know?\"

And after that, maybe something about it not being nice to tell people they don\'t know what they\'re talking about. And maybe also something about how it\'s okay to be wrong.

Oh, I\'m full of advice. :)

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Bigdaddy 3 years ago 1 point
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Actually the only time I back off is when I am actually wrong. I handled it with kid gloves when they were toddlers but they were corrected and if they were disrespectful they were disciplined.

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foodad 3 years ago 1 point
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oh yeah! The argument in the co-sleeping post. ;)

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