The Only Anti-Crying Maneuver You’ll Ever Need
Posted on 10 03, 2009 under The Manual by Noodad | Comments
There
is a technique that you need to know. It is guaranteed to stop your
crying baby instantaneously. It is extremely easy to execute and it's
power is half Jedi Mind Trick, half Vulcan Death Grip.
Yet no one ever seems to talk about it. In fact, my wife and I would
never have known it if our kid's pediatrician didn't tell us. So why
the secrecy? Probably because no one has the balls to reveal the
secret. I am proud to announce that my balls are fully loaded. Here's
how to perform the only anti-crying maneuver you will ever need.
Step One:
Pick up crying subject
Step Two:
Put your left hand behind the crying subject's neck with the subject
facing you. This puts your thumb on the right hand side of their neck.
Step Three:
Put your right hand and grip the subject in their right inner thigh so that your thumb is pointing towards the belly button.
{youtube}NDdLLzRkrq4{/youtube}Step Four:
Lift the subject with both hands in a shoveling motion. And poof! No more crying. Now see the move in action here .
I don't know why
it works only that it does works. And let's be honest, that's all you
will care about too. Anyone else have fool-proof techniques to stop a
crying baby?
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