A Dog / Kids Dilemma: What about Boone?

Posted on 04 04, 2008 under Master Debaters by wahoodad | Comments

dscf2090wr.jpgSo I visited my friends Wally and Jen the other day to see their beautiful new baby girl, and they asked me my thoughts on a disagreement/issue they were having concerning the family pet.  I thought I’d put the scenario out there to help them get some unbiased opinions from noodad readers.  Here’s the dilemma:

A few years ago, before they had children, my friends picked out a spirited black lab/chow mix pooch from the local kennel.  They named him Boone.  Boone hasn’t been the easiest dog.  He’s a prolific barker, jumps on guests, and he gets carsick.  My friends hired a professional dog trainer and Boone’s behavior is improving, especially when there are no visitors in the house.  Although Boone is challenging and willful (as my friend from Ireland would say), he’s never hurt anyone.  He’s just kind of an excitable dog and they love him.

Fast forward to last week.  Wally and Jen have two kids now.  Their boy is about 16 months old, and his sister is a few weeks old.  Boone has been fine with the boy, but last week something happened.  Their sister-in-law was keeping an eye on the boy in the kitchen while Jen fed the newborn in a bedroom.  The boy apparently kept poking and prodding Boone, and the dog snapped at him.  Boone made some horrific growling noise when he snapped that Jen heard from the other room and it scared her quite a bit.  So, now Wally and Jen are at a crossroads as far as Boone is concerned.

Jen thinks that Boone could be a danger to the kids.  She wouldn’t feel comfortable hosting play dates with Boone in the house.  Jen doesn’t want to be that person on the news professing how her dog never hurt anyone before after he’s attacked her kid or someone else’s.   She isn’t on the verge of kicking Boone to the curb, but, at the same time, if there’s even a remote chance that Boone will take a chunk out of a kid, she’s reluctant to take that risk.  Finally, Jen understands that Boone is a dog, and as loving and happy as dogs can be, every dog has that primitive instinct buried somewhere in its brain.

Wally has a different view.  He grew up with dogs as part of the family and believes that if handled properly, it’s safe to have a dog.  The incident with his son was an isolated one.  Boone is very patient with Wally’s son, but adjusting to another kid into the family might be stressing Boone out a little, just as it can with people.  His son wasn’t hurt, and there’s also a possibility that he learned something in the process about not harassing the dog.  Wally is very good when it comes to introducing Boone to kids who might be a little nervous about dogs, and he makes an effort to keep Boone away from kids who are just plain afraid of dogs.  With the proper precautions, Wally believes that incidents like this can be avoided in the future and there’s no reason to fear Boone’s presence in the home.

So, what do you think?  With apologies to The Clash, should Boone stay or should he go?  Has anyone else dealt with this kind of doggie dilemma?

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Viewing 9 Comments

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    Disclaimer: I'm not a parent and, as of a couple months ago, I'm not a dog owner (She was old, had a tumor, etc.). But my girlfriend has owned a dog bakery for 10 years, so I'm not anti-dog by any means.

    Boone sounds like a pain in the ass. Wrestling him away from playmates or locking him up (where he no doubt barks away) is the last thing I would want to do when I'm trying to enjoy the memories in the making of my child. It's not fair to the dog, either really. He may have been cool and fun back when they were just a couple, but now they're are a family. It's easy for me to say, but I'd start finding Boone another home. Maybe a young couple that they know may be interested, so they could still see him.
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    Boone needs to go, and a smaller dog could be found. With two small children every precaution needs to me made to make everyone feel comfortable and safe at all times. Your home is your sanctuary, not a feared place. I'm assuming the wife is at home right now (since you mentioned a newborn of a couple weeks), and most likely often by herself with both children. She has every right to determine the layout of her home and those can reside in it. If she has any reservations about Boone, she is entitled to them 100%. The husband wasn't home at the time of the incident and therefore didn't see or even hear what she heard. Boone needs to go to a home that can handle him and his needs. And just because Boone hasn't hurt anyone yet, doesn't mean he might not one day. These could be the warning signs or something to come that need to be listened to. The article mentions "Jen doesn’t want to be that person on the news professing how her dog never hurt anyone before after he’s attacked her kid or someone else’s. "---Just because those people always say their dogs never hurt anyone, doesn't mean that there weren't signs along the way that they chose to ignore or just cope with. Find Boone a new home before the family becomes the evening news.
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    More often than not, parents must defend thier pets from the children, rather than the other way around. I also have a 16 month old baby and a dog, and have had to deal with the same issues. We pet owners are a trusting bunch, and we're always surprised when our laid-back lab mix let's our little ones know their being irritating for the first time. For sure, it's a wake-up call. Maybe Fido doesn't like Jr. crawling all over him at every opportunity after all???
    As much as the dog must be trained to understand that he is subserviant to any two legged critters, no matter how small they are, the little ones must also be trained as to what is/isn't appropriate to do with their pets. Obviosuly, a 16 month old can't comprehend the lessons 100% which is why no matter how much you trust your animal, you should never leave them alone with your kids.
    We've given our dog a dog bed in our family room where we spend much of our time. Our daughter isn't allowed to even touch the dog when he is on his bed. Fido knows he's got a place he can go to relax, and our daughter is being taught that she's not allowed in Fido's special place.
    I certainly understand why people get nervous in these situations, but it just doesn't feel right to me to kick the family pet to the curb every time the going gets a little tough. This is what you signed up for when you brought the dog home on day 1. The problem is very rarely bad dogs.
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    The dog snapped at their son an they are at a CROSSROADS? Don't wait until Boone snaps the kid's face off. Boone needs to go.

    Tim, don't take this the wrong way, but people like you scare the pants off of me. The soft language (not to mention the wacky spelling, grammar and word usage) you are using like "subserviant to two legged critters" and "we're always suprised when our laid-back lab let's our little one know their being irritating" when referring to incidents with animals is shocking to me. Bottom line is that you do not know what is going on in an animal's mind. If the pet gives you a warning sign, take the sign! Act!

    If your dog is bigger than the kid and shows a sign that they would harm the kid, you need to make other arrangements for the animal. It's a no brainer. No dog and healthy kid > dog and mauled kid.
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    So the only reaction to a dog growling for the first time in it's life is to bring it in to the vet to have it put down or find it a new home? Sounds pretty extreme. The alternative is to not be a lazy parent or a lazy pet owner. You could take the easy road, and get rid of the dog, or you could teach your kid to be a decent pet owner and train the dog better. The bottom line is not everybody should be pet owners to begin with, and Foodad, you're one of them.

    Wacky? That's a first for me.
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    Tim, no one suggested "to have it put down" in regards to Boone. So please don't accuse us of suggesting such extreme and outlandish measures. "To have it put down" would not be an appropriate or helpful piece of advice. This is a forum for all of us to help wahoodad's friend, not go on our own individual soap boxes issues. All the suggestions have been to find him another more appropriate home. One that doesn't have a newborn and 16 month old in it. The owners themselves have admitted that "Boone hasn’t been the easiest dog. He’s a prolific barker, jumps on guests, and he gets carsick." and "Boone is challenging and willful ". They've also tried dog trainers and this is still the result. They are clearly not lazy pet owners. They are concerned parents whom are also the owners of a difficult dog. Please do not distract readers with such incorrect quotes and statements.
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    I say kill the dog.
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    Without being there and knowing the dog it's hard to say. But, I would assume the child was aggravating the dog. I know my son does, and the dog finally said enough. the dog has no other way to communicate his displeasure than growling. That's what growling is, a warning. I would do 2 things at this point teach the child to leave the dog alone especially when he's growling, and teach the dog not to growl at the baby. My dog had to learn this lesson and now when he doesn't want to be bothered he gets up and walks away and my son is not allowed to follow and continue to agitate.
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    Steve, I'm curious what exactly and precisely you did to

    "teach the child to leave the dog alone especially when he’s growling, and teach the dog not to growl at the baby"

    What was your teaching method? I'm glad to hear that you had a successful method for your household, but I think Wally and Jen might benefit from a few more details.
 

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