Orgasmic Childbirth Debunked

Posted on 01 14, 2008 under Predad by schneidermike | View Comments

summer21.jpgAfter I saw Two Chicks One Cup, I thought I had seen it all. That was until my Noodad pointed me to Orgasmic Childbirth. In my taiji practice I have learned a lot about the power of the mind, but this was more even my powerful mind could comprehend. These people actually believe that they can train themselves to have orgasms during child birth.

My favorite lines: “If conception feels good, why not childbirth?” and “Little by little, our culture is ridding itself of the fear, shame, and guilt that keep many of us from experiencing sex – let alone birth – as orgasmic.”


I want to be the first in the blogsphere to point out that it is not, in fact, shame that causes pain during child birth. It does not take a master of the obvious (like me) to see that the pain is caused by a ~six to 9 pound child child being pushed through the vagina. Noodad says it’s the “ol’ watermelon through the pea hole”. Even when my wife had our little preemie muffin weighing in at under 4 pounds, she still felt like she had wrestled with Chewbacca.

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  • Meg
    Well allrighty then! I'm not sure if i would be comfortable with that. But don't knock it until you try it right? With my due date approaching increasingly fast (7 weeks and counting) it's nice to hear different stories, even if they do have striking similarities to erotic novels read by soccer moms around the world.
  • foodad
    Fiction is fun.
  • Mia
    I was in the middle of my second homebirth, ready to crown, with my midwife doing some perineal massage to help the tissues stretch. At first I was uncomfortable with it, as I was in a lot of pain and didn't want anyone touching me "down there". Then my first contraction hit that gave me the first real urge to push. My midwife continued massaging me and urged me to push a little. I gave a push, and bore down hard. There was no stopping the urge now. The pain and burning were too intense. The midwife told me to slow down and breath through the next contraction to let the tissues stretch. Do you know how hard that was? All I could think of was the nurning and intense pain of my body begging me to bear down. "It burns!" was all i could mutter through the pants. "I have to push!" But the mnidwife was insistent, telling me she didn't want me to tear, but I would if I didn't slow things down. She then showed me a little trick. The contraction started and it was all I could do to not push. The midwife continued her perineal massage, and then I felt her fingers gently massaging my clit. It took me by surprise, but was instantly pleasurable. I started to moan again, this time with pleasure. IT was enough to relax me, and let my tissues stretch gently. She continued it witht he next contraction, and I pushed down again, feeling both pleasure and pain, but climaxing as the head slid out. I looked down as I felt my body contract once more and the rest of the child slide out. I didn't believe it either, but it can happen.
  • LOL, Screwdad!

    I'm not going for this booshiznit, either. I'm a big fan of unmedicated childbirth, but I can tell you, after having done one myself, helped my sister-in-law through one last Wednesday, and staring down a second experience in five months: orgasm it is not. Not by a long shot.

    If orgasm felt like childbirth, we'd have none of the latter.
  • redhawk
    If it works for her, I support it wholeheartedly, but I fear the practice will provide fertile ground for fetishists.
  • screwdad
    After going through 3 vaginal deliveries with my wife I can tell you the only similarity between childbirth and sex was the screaming of, "Jesus Christ."
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