Is it OK to Spank Your Kid?

Kids can be kids which means sometimes, no matter how peaceful you think you may be, you want to just pound the hell out of them. They know, better than anybody, how to get under your skin. They know how to piss you off and then piss you off even more.

I used to get spanked. I don't think it ever really hurt, it was more the sting of being struck that did damage. But some of my friends speak of getting a literal lashing or belt whipping growing up. These dudes all grew up to be normal people with no serious development or social skill shortcomings.
Read the rest of this entry »

5 Kick-Ass Advent Calendar Ideas

If you celebrate Christmas, the countdown is on until the "best day of your kid's life". It started shortly after you polished off the rest of the leftover turkey and right before you made the trek outside to cut down the tree. If your kids are old enough to get excited about Christmas, then they are old enough to appreciate an advent calendar.

An advent calendar is a device that counts down the days until Christmas. In it's basic form, it is a cardboard like box with 25 perforated windows numbered "1" through "25". Each day, you can open another window or door. They can range from cheap plastic or cardboard all the way to expensive wooden boxes with hinged wooden doors.
Read the rest of this entry »

Kids on the Laps of Strangers

It has gone down as the funniest picture ever taken of my daughter. Here she is, with a beautiful purple dress on, reaching out her arms in a desperate plea to be rescued. This would be a sad picture had she not been sitting on the lap of the ugliest Santa Claus you have ever seen. Here she is, as if we handed her over to a third world prison guard. Here he is, with his tree trunk thighs and ratty beard smiling his $6/hour Rent-A-Santa smile. It's the greatest picture ever.
Read the rest of this entry »

The Top 7 Babes in Children’s Television

So the kids are watching the tv and you notice something out of the corner of the eye. Amidst the puppets, cartoons, and claymation, you spot a sight for sore eyes: you spot a babe. Yes, noodads, you would be surprised how good looking kids television has become.

But before you go on thinking you will tune into Sprout instead of the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show you need to cool your jets and finish reading this article. This isn’t Baywatch, this is still children’s programming. Here is a list of the Top 7 Babes in Children’s Television:
Read the rest of this entry »

Would you take away your son’s porn stash?

So you have a boy and he's at that age when…you know…he's exploring. He is bound to have some porn laying around somewhere. And you know all the secret hiding places. So…

That brings us to this week's question… 

Read the rest of this entry »

The Great AFP Debate: How Should You Weigh In?

Unfortunately, pregnancy is harder than just dealing with your wife's nausea, insecurities, and fatigue. Sometimes along the way, you and your wife will have to deal with some seriously important questions.

One of these important decisions comes around the 16th week of pregnancy. It is the decision on whether or not to take the AFP test. AFP stands for Alphafetoprotein, a protein made by your unborn kid and secreted through their liver and then dumped into your wife's blood. The test is a simple blood test that checks for abnormally high or low levels of that protein.
Read the rest of this entry »

Is getting your baby’s ears pierced an act of child abuse?

Last week at the mall I saw a kid, couldn't be more than a year old, getting her ear's pierced. She screamed bloody murder the whole time but it was ok—although she didn't like the pain, her parents were very happy. 

Getting your ear's pierced hurts. Yet I frequently see little kids with their ears pierced. Clearly, the decision to pierce is being made by the parents, not the kids themselves.

Which brings us to this week's question… 

Read the rest of this entry »

Using Santa To Manipulate Your Kids

For a fake person, Santa Claus is pretty darn powerful. It is amazing how a little holiday cheer and the suspension of disbelief can elevate a guy to 100% obedience stature. No, Santa isn't obese, he's jolly! Naw, Santa isn't a Peeping Tom, he needs to keep tabs on you to know whether you deserve his swag bag come December 25th!

Despite any cynicism you may now have as an adult about Santa Claus, if you celebrate Christmas, there will be a sweet little time between the ages of 3-8, when your kid will be at the mercy of the man with the belly full of jelly. So why not use that to your advantage? You are going to have to buy stuff for them and let Santa take all the credit anyways, why not get something back?
Read the rest of this entry »

Your Kid, The Shareholder

My grandfather tried to teach us the importance of saving money by giving us "Dime Kitties". Those of you unfamiliar with this feline-inspired investment vehicle will be amazed at its simplicity. The cat shaped cardboard folder has empty slots inside if it. Each slot is conveniently sized to hold a dime.

In theory a child saves coins by filling the slots. Once the folder is full, you take the Kitty to the bank and deposit the coins into a savings account. On birthdays Grandpa sent full Dime Kittys. Upon receipt, I promptly unloaded the coins and bought three dollars worth of candy at the nearby Stop-N-Go.  

In these modern days you can take a more sophisticated approach to teach your kids how to save and invest for the future. Instead of pumping a few coins into a savings account at your local bank you can actually buy your kid stock in that bank. In the future Timmy can have more than a jar full of old coins. He can be a shareholder. 

Read the rest of this entry »

The Anti-Crying Onesie Maneuver Video

Wahoodad, This one's for you.

{youtube}sjGxfViEI-M{/youtube}

To read about this technique in greater detail, click here . 

Read the rest of this entry »